Marriage Quotes Napkins

 "Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them."

"For a successful marriage, every woman and man should have their own bathroom."

"If at first you don't succeed... Try doing it the way your wife told you."

"Sometimes I wonder if men and women are really suited for each other. Perhaps they should just live next door and visit now and then." Katherine Hepburn

"Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution." Groucho Marx

"Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband."

"A man is incomplete until he is married. After that he is finished."

"Husbands are the best people to share your secrets with. They'll never tell anyone because they are never listening."

"Every time you talk to your wife, remember that this conversation will be recorded for training and quality purposes."

"Never laugh at your wife's choices. You are one of them..."

"Marriage is like a game of chess. Except the board is water, the pieces are smoke and no move will affect the outcome."

"Marriage is about understanding what irritates your spouse and using it strategically."

"Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards." Benjamin Franklin

"90% of being married is just shouting "what" from the other room."

"By all means, marry. If you find a good wife you'll become happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." Socrates

"Husbands are like fires... they go out when unattended." Zsa Zsa Gabor

"The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret." Henry Youngman

"I didn't find out what happiness means until I got married...and then it was too late."

"Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed." Albert Einstein

"We both said "I Do" and we haven't agreed on a single thing since."

"Being married is like having a best friend who doesn't remember anything you say."

"MARRIAGE TIP #46: Your wife won't start an argument with you while you are cleaning."

"The most important four words for a marriage: "I'll do the dishes.""

"Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life."

"Marriage: When dating goes too far."