Snarky Quotes

"WHISKEY... because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad."

"Sometimes I agree with people just so they will stop talking."

"Some things are better left unsaid Which I generally realize right after I have said them."

"I like Champagne... and maybe 3 people."

"Does running out of wine count as cardio?"

"You had me at day drinking."

"You know nothing about a woman... until she's drunk and mad at you."

"Be the reason someone smiles today ...or the reason they drink. Whatever works."

"Remember that time I asked for your opinion? Neither do I."

"I am not arguing, I'm just explaining why I am right."

"I'd rather be someone's shot of bourbon than everyone's cup of tea."

"If drinking on the porch counts then, yes...call me outdoorsy."

"Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed."

"Why do I drink Champagne for breakfast? Doesn't everyone?"

"Winners never quit but quitters get to the bar first."

"I'm one drink away from telling everyone what I really think."

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions."

"Life happens. Wine helps."

"I'm pretty sure my death will be caused by making a sarcastic comment at precisely the wrong time."

"I finally quit drinking for good. Now I drink for bad."

"A party without wine is really just a meeting."

"I've learned so much from my mistakes that I am thinking of making a few more!"

"I'm not always sarcastic, Sometimes I'm asleep."

"I won't eat dairy, gluten or artificial flavors... but I'll drink anything."

"To me, "Drink Responsibly" means just don't spill it."